No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
