If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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