Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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