New invention idea: vibrating tampons
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
high people should be assigned attendants
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
