just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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