I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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