at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
