please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
