Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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