you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
