I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
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VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
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