I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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