Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Randomize
