He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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