oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
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