why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
mondays should just be called national damage control day
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I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
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