this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
