ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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