barbara walters just said penis...
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
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