Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(985): View more from Louisiana

BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART

(601): View more from Mississippi

Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.

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(909): View more from California

it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines

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(904): View more from Florida

Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?

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(604): View more from British Columbia

As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(714): View more from California

We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.

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(631): View more from New York

does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?

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(337): View more from Louisiana

IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.

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(304): View more from West Virginia

When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.

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(901): View more from Tennessee

I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie

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