Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
my liver is dry heaving
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Randomize
