He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Randomize
