Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
