We won't sleep together?
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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