I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize
