hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize