Three words: puerto rican gang bang
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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