How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
