i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
