They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
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