STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
