You're a womanizer and a bitch.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Randomize
