i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
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we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
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