then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
