butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I want to be your penis for a week.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
