I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
