They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
