just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass