i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.