I only kidnapped one of them. chill
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
