Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize