dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
