Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
