Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
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