I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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