I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
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