I have demons in me.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
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