After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.