Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
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