guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
