your thong is hanging out like whoa
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
